


i want to forget everything but you

by wandering_soul_with_a_writing_goal



Series: i want to forget everything but you [2]
Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst, Bonding over trauma, Canon Compliant, F/F, Internalized Homophobia, Lonnie Byers Being an Asshole, M/M, Mutual Pining, Neil Hargrove Being an Asshole, Nightmares, Post S3, Shared Trauma, Sleepovers, Slow Burn, bicon el hopper, gay af max mayfield, hot chocolate fixes everything, joyce is the best mother ever, lesbian role model robin, lucas is an ally with a capital a
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-07-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:48:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 20,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24445336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wandering_soul_with_a_writing_goal/pseuds/wandering_soul_with_a_writing_goal
Summary: after the mess at starcourt, max and el find it hard to sleep on their own and end up getting closer through midnight hot chocolates. while el figures out who she is, max realizes some things about her feelings. featuring: lesbian role model Robin, Joyce being the most badass and amazing mother ever, lots of cuddles, coming to terms with a traumatizing past and Nancy being the bicon we all deserve.
Relationships: Eleven | Jane Hopper/Maxine "Max" Mayfield, Will Byers/Mike Wheeler
Series: i want to forget everything but you [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1768462
Comments: 79
Kudos: 142





	1. i can't lose you. i'd rather lose myself

**Author's Note:**

> Hey friends and welcome to this angst fest. Be sure to have some tissues nearby! This is a collab with the absolutely wonderful @wandering_soul_with_a_writing_goal! She wrote El's POV and I wrote Max. Hope y'all enjoy!!

The first time Max realizes that this isn’t a dream, she’s standing in the middle of the Starcourt Mall parking lot in the rain, watching El learn Hopper’s not going to come back.

She’s not good with words- never has been. There’s a reason she’s always dumping Lucas in such a harsh way. She wants to tell him she doesn’t feel the same, but… it never comes out right. Instead, Max pushes people away and puts up walls around her heart and pretends it doesn’t beat extra fast when El laughs…

The rest of the night is a blurry, storm filled haze. People are talking to her, asking her questions and she just nods, gives a fake smile and goes where they tell her to.

Max just wants to go back to running through the mall with El’s hand in hers, laughing like nothing else mattered and feeling like they were the only two people in the world. But, there’s the mind flayer or whatever everyone calls it and Billy’s gone and…

She doesn’t know if she can go home right now, so in a quiet voice, she asks Ms. Byers if she can stay there for the night. Her stepdad screaming and glass breaking and doors slamming and the ghost of Billy haunting every step she takes in that house where she can never breathe would suffocate her.

Joyce just smiles like she knows exactly what’s going through Max’s head and soon, she’s in the back of someone’s car and headed out to the Byers house.

She and El hold hands the entire time, leaning on each other because grief is tearing their souls apart. Max doesn’t even know why she’s so devastated. Billy wasn’t even a good person- he was loud and cruel and his words stung more than Neil’s backhanded slaps and he tried to hurt her friends.

But, he was her brother and sometimes, grief works in funny ways.

Sometimes, it’s waking up in the middle of the night with tears streaming down your face because you remember that the guy who wasn’t even your real brother wouldn’t be there to teach you how to surf anymore, just like he’d always promised. Sometimes, it’s missing someone you didn’t even realize you cared about so hard that it hurts every single fiber of your being.

Sometimes, there’s a hole in your chest that’s the size of your fist and the only thing that fills it is the girl that sleeps next to you who collapsed out of exhaustion the second Joyce gestured towards the couch.

Max sits and stares at El dreaming, wondering what’s going through her head. She tries to go back to sleep, but the only thing she sees when she closes her eyes is that thing tearing apart her brother’s body and she has to choke back screams over and over again. So, she pulls her knees to her chest, digs her nails into them until the pain distracts her and pretends that everything’s normal again.

Max isn’t really sure what normal is, but she wants it now more than she’s wanted anything in her entire life.

Except for…

No, no, no, no.

Eventually, she fades into a restless nightmare full of her best friend’s screams and fireworks flashing before her eyes and waking up but El just wasn’t there and blood in a grocery store aisle and tentacles reaching out to choke her and Billy getting ripped to pieces over and over and over and over again.

When she sits up this time, she screams for real and El sits up straight.

“Max?” she asks and Max has to remember where she is, remember that those dark shadows aren’t coming to steal El again, remember that they’re safe now and the gate is closed and….

“Max?” El says again.

“I just…” her voice cracks, even though she’s trying not to cry, “I had a really bad dream.”

And El pulls her into her chest until tears are soaking through the yellow shirt they bought together and they’re both sobbing, shaking, holding each other like they’re the only two people in the world.  
When El finally pulls away, it doesn’t feel like enough. For some reason, the cavity in Max’s chest aches even more and she wishes that it didn’t have to end and that she could just brush the hair out of El’s face and use the pads of her thumbs to sweep away the tears and close her eyes without seeing monsters and lean in and…

_No, no, no, no._

“I miss him,” her best friend whispers and Max reaches over to hold her with all the strength she has left. She’ll give El anything and everything if she can, if the girl will let her.

 _Take it, take it all,_ she wants to say, but the words are stuck in her throat with the screams and the sobs that have been locked in there since she watched the thing reach into the roof and try to grab her best friend away from her.

_I just found you. I can’t lose you. I’d rather lose myself._

They somehow get blessed with a dreamless sleep, tangled up in each other and when Max wakes up as the sun peeks in through the windows with El’s brown hair on her cheek and her head on Max’s shoulder, she thinks for a moment that maybe everything is a new kind of normal.


	2. black dress

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> el feels alone before going to hopper's funeral. luckily, max is there to help her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just a reminder that this is a collab with @writing_soul_with_a_wandering_goal and that she wrote the El chapters, while i wrote the max chapters! she's so freaking talented... go send her some love, friends!!!

El didn’t understand why people wore black at funerals. Why would people wear such a dark, gloomy color when everyone was already grieving?

As El changed into a borrowed black dress, all she could manage to think was, it does fit.

Black was the closest color El could use to describe her feelings, but in reality, the things in her head were so hollow, so empty, but so angry and sad and violent and scared, that there wasn’t really an accurate way to express it with clothes.

So, black it was.

El waited for the tears to come. People were expected to cry when people died. But El felt like she’d cried out her entire soul already, and what was the point of crying if she didn’t have a pair of strong, fatherly arms to pick her up and hug her until the tears stopped?

Of course, El had so many people who would comfort her and hug her and tell her everything was alright. But right now, she needed one of her dad’s warm, safe embraces. The hugs that made her feel like everything was alright, because her father was there, and he would take care of her no matter what.

Why did he have to go… El couldn’t even think the word… in a Russian base?

She realized that she had stopped in the middle of zipping up her dress. She’d been doing that a lot for the past few days. Getting so lost in her own head, which was a whirlpool that could suck you in for hours at a time if you weren’t careful, that she forgot what she was doing. El always thought that no one could ever survive a trip through her head.

She finished getting changed and looked in the mirror. Her hair hadn’t been brushed yet, but Ms. Byers had promised in a gentle voice that she would make it look nice. She’d been staying strong, cooking meals and making the funeral arrangements, but El could tell that she was as broken as herself.

In her reflection, El saw the dark circles under her eyes, and her impulses took control. She had to fix it. She had to look nice.

El went into Ms. Byers’ room, looking for a makeup bag. El didn’t know anything about makeup or how to apply it, but that didn’t matter. She had to make sure she was presentable. Not for herself, but for her dad. For Hopper.

She found a small tube that seemed to match her skin tone, and without a second of rational thought, opened it and squeezed a big blob onto her finger. She transferred some to her other finger and at the same time, smeared both under her eyes. It was cold and wet on her skin.

Mirror.

She went back into Jonathan’s bedroom, where he’d told her she could come in any time. He’d even offered his bed, but El couldn’t take being in a confined space, in the dark, alone… Well, the room had a mirror.

Oh no. Her eyes looked awful.

This small thing was a crack in a dam that held back an ocean. El felt her face warm, and her vision blurred as tears filled her eyes. She sat on the bed and barely moved as she cried, feeling like she’d never stop.

Knock knock knock.

El was the only one in the house. Ms. Byers and Jonathan were helping set up at the funeral home, and Will was biking to “clear his head”. If only it was that easy. Just go on a bike ride and clear away everything.

So, she needed to pull herself together and get the door.

Biting her lip, El barely managed to hold in her tears as she opened the door to find a familiar redhead.

Max. Without even thinking or caring, El let out her tears and pulled Max into a hug. They held each other until El’s tears dried, and continued to hold each other in content silence.

Max’s arms were a new home to El. They felt so natural and welcoming that El always found herself wishing she could be in them again. She couldn’t get a hug from her dad, but she could get a hug from her best friend, who made her feel like she was the best person in the world, who gave El butterflies whenever she looked her way.

Warmth. Comfort. Safety.

Finally, they broke apart, and Max asked, “What happened to your eyes?”

El had forgotten. “Makeup.” Her voice was shaky. Max grabbed El’s hand, looking at her with eyes full of caring and sympathy.

“Come on. I don’t know much about makeup, but I’ll try to fix you up.”

\--

Three hours later, El stood outside at the cemetery with a small crowd of people. The Reverend was reading something, but she only half listened. She couldn’t pull her eyes away from the empty grave that read Jim Hopper.

She was in a much better state than she’d been earlier. Max had fixed up her face so that El looked in the mirror and saw Before El. Before El was who she had been before she’d been bitten by the Monster. That was what had caused everything bad. That was why her powers were gone, and she couldn’t save-- well, she couldn’t be there to help. After El had been through a 1000 mile long roller coaster of pain and grief. After El couldn’t even recognize herself in the mirror. She knew her face, but not the girl behind it.

If only Before El could have worked a little harder, her dad would still be around.

El remembered the conversation, their last conversation… 

“I can fight.”

“Better than any of us. But I need you safe.”

The reverend stopped talking and the crowd of people broke apart. She was in a haze as she walked to the Byers car and they drove back home, only El could never really be at home again…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dabs eyes with tissues and sniffles*


	3. say my name until i can chase it into the sunset

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> max ends up at the byers house after a bad dream. she and el comfort each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks so much for sticking with us, friends!! make sure you have those tissues ;) 
> 
> note: this chapter has references to child abuse because neil hargrove is an asshole. please take care of yourself and skip if you need to!

She’s standing in the middle of Starcourt mall and it’s crumbling around her. She can hear the fireworks crackling and Will shouting that they’re almost out and footsteps pounding after her threw the Gap and Billy’s car engine revving and El’s screaming over it all… the screaming… it echoes and echoes and echoes and… 

And Max is sitting up in bed, biting down as hard as she can on her fist so she doesn’t wake anyone up. When she reaches up to brush her hair out of her face, there’s tears that are sticky on her palm and she has no idea where they came from. 

Max throws off the covers and stumbles through the hallway in the dark, jamming sneakers on her feet without looking and jumping on her bike. 

She pedals as hard as she can while her lungs burn and takes turns down familiar streets that look so different in the dark. At every turn, Max wonders if something’s tentacles will grab her and reach in or if a monster that has no face will be waiting or if the worst thing of all will be standing right there, ready to grab her by the elbow and drag her back to the house where she can’t escape Billy’s sneer. 

Eventually, Max is standing on the Byers’ doorstep and she’s holding out a fist to knock. 

She’s panting and it’s started to rain, but she doesn’t notice because all she can think about is El’s big, brown eyes and her smile that somehow makes everything better and she wants to collapse into her best friend’s arms until the nightmare is out of sight, out of mind. 

Max knocks and takes a deep breath, waiting for someone to open the door. Finally, finally, finally after what feels like eons, but was definitely only a few seconds, El swings it open. 

“Max?” she asks and Max’s name on El’s tongue is like the sweetest song she’s ever heard. 

Say it again, she wants to say, say it until the sound follows me into my dreams and I can chase it into the sunset. Say it until neither of us can remember anything else. 

There are bags under her friend’s eyes, signs that she’s slept even less than Max and guilt hits her like a punch to the stomach. El is the one who lost a father. She’s the one who lost her powers and practically got dragged through a roof and almost got killed. Max doesn’t deserve to be falling apart right now. She should be the one holding El’s hand and leading her through the darkness, not the other way around. 

“Nightmare,” is all she can mumble before the tears start falling again and her cheeks flush red with shame. 

“Me too.” 

And those are the words that send the two girls colliding once again. 

Max adjusts her stance to support El as she shakes, praying that something will be able to make the girl smile again like her face breaking in half and light is coming out of every pore, instead of the ghost of a grin that’s just barely replaced it. She wants to make everything go away so badly that it hurts. 

If Max could take on all the pain, absorb it and carry it with her so El wouldn’t have to, she would. But pain isn’t like that. It takes and takes from the people who are the best of us until they have nothing left and somehow, they keep on going. 

She doesn’t know how long they stand there, holding each other with El’s hands tangled in Max’s red hair and Max gripping El’s baggy t-shirt. 

She barely registers it when Joyce comes to the door and places a gentle hand on their elbows to lead them to the kitchen table and make mugs of hot cocoa. All she can feel is this strange sense of safe and home and when she looks into El’s eyes, maybe even… 

No, no, no, no. 

“You wanna talk about it?” Ms. Byers asks in that voice that makes Max feel at ease and she can finally breathe again. 

Max wishes that her parents were like this and absentmindedly strokes the newest bruise on her stomach with one hand as she musters up her best genuine smile and her fingers find their way to El’s like magnets under the table. 

“Just stuff about Starcourt,”she mutters and when her best friend squeezes her hand back, her heart soars a little bit even though she’s falling apart. 

Will wanders into the room, still wiping sleep out of his eyes and muttering groggily. 

“Hey, Max.” 

“Sorry I woke you up,” she replies and he shrugs before sitting down at the table and drinking some of El’s hot cocoa. 

“Geez, why do you put so many marshmallows in this?” he complains and El rolls her eyes. 

The hole in Max’s chest fills a little with something that feels like butterflies and a smile spreads throughout her entire body until she’s laughing a little bit and her best friend is gripping her hand, giggling too, as Will and Joyce stare at them like they’re going crazy. 

Maybe they are. Maybe they’re absolutely insane, but El is here and she’s holding Max’s hand and the nightmare isn’t real, not anymore and everything will be alright. 

As long as the girl sitting next to her smiles like that.


	4. Coca Cola

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> while playing d&d with the party, el sees lucas drinking coca cola and has flashbacks to the lab.

The wind hitting her face was refreshing. Her hair flew behind her as she biked alongside Will.

El could tell what Will meant when he said that biking cleared his head. With the wind, and the constant movement of her legs, and the big, colored houses with welcoming yards, it was easy to push away the thoughts.

She didn’t think it would be so easy without the boy biking next to her. Will was the brother she’d never had, but now she did. As soon as El moved in with the Byers they instantly clicked, and it wasn’t uncommon for them to sit in Will’s room and just talk. Talking helped especially when it was with such a patient, caring soul.

Now, they were biking to Mike’s house to hang out with the party. “Hanging out” usually consisted of D&D, witnessing Lucas and Mike argue about whatever they could, and Max whispering jokes into El’s ear and making her burst into giggles. El loved everything about being with the party, but being with Max had to be her favorite.

El couldn’t even remember a time when she felt that with Mike. Of course, the boy made her feel special, and they had a close bond. But El didn’t feel her eyes pulled to him, her face warm at the sight of him, or a burst of nerves when she thought of him. Not the way she did with Max.

El didn’t know what she felt with Max. But that was a problem for another day.

Will slowed to a stop and jumped off his bike, and El followed suit. They walked their bikes to the driveway as El viewed the first home she had ever had.

The Wheeler house was comfort. It was like one of the houses that you’d imagine about, or see in commercials. The grass was an impossible green, the windows were lined with blue curtains, and everything was neat and kempt.

Being inside the Wheeler house was even better. It felt like being wrapped in fuzzy blankets and watching her favorite show.

In the past when she’d stayed there, she’d had to hide from Mike’s family, but somehow that felt much safer than knowing them. The more people she knew, the more people had a chance to hurt her. Now, she could walk around freely, as Mr. and Mrs. Wheeler only knew her as “Eleanor, Mike’s classmate”. But she barely ever saw them around, anyway.

Will knocked on the door and within a minute, Lucas answered. The two grinned and did some sort of handshake. If Max was there, she’d definitely whisper into El’s ear, “Oh my god, they are such nerds,” and El would laugh. She smiled at the thought as Lucas welcomed them inside, acting like he was a real estate agent selling the house.

“And over here we have the grand room,” he said, gesturing toward the basement.

“Very grand,” Will commented, playing along.

Lucas turned to El. “What do you think, Miss?”

El smiled and shook her head. “Very grand.”

He ushered them inside and El’s eyes immediately found Max, who was sitting on the couch, having some sort of disagreement with Mike. Max saw her and smiled, and she smiled back.

The Party spent the next half hour playing a D&D campaign that Dustin had set up. The campaign involved a mysterious mountain inhabited by Ogres, and hidden treasure found inside the mountain. El had figured that part out.

“Totally not copying the Hobbit.”

“Shut up, Mike.”

They got lost in the campaign, until Lucas stood up and declared that he was getting a drink. Mike mentioned that there was soda in the fridge, and Lucas left as Max called after him, “Grab me something, stalker!”. Whenever El heard the nickname, she felt a little left out, because she never really understood it and probably never would.

Max must have noticed a shift in El, because she turned her attention to her. “Hey, great catch on the hidden treasure thing. I wouldn’t have figured that out.” El shrugged but couldn’t stop her face from relaxing into a smile.

They sat in content silence until Lucas returned with a red Coke can… 

And the memories came at her faster than she could steady herself. 

Before she knew it, El was back at the lab. She was stuck in the chair. The white walls were screaming at her as Papa stood behind the glass, watching, waiting.

Her hand shook. She couldn’t breathe. She didn’t know what was real. All she knew was that she had to do it. Crush the can. The silence hurt her ears and the walls were closing in on her and the room was spinning and she couldn’t breathe and Papa was just staring at her and… 

She couldn’t do it.

Click. Door opening. Then she was being pulled away by two men whose grip hurt her arms, and screaming, screaming, screaming and she was stuck in a room, and she wouldn’t be let out, and she felt herself screaming in the lab, but nobody was listening and… 

“Papa! Papa!” she was screaming and tears were streaming down her face, but she couldn’t breathe and... 

“El?” Max’s voice shattered the memory. 

And then she was back in Mike’s basement, being held by a redheaded girl, shaking and panting as Max looked on with concerned eyes and hugged her tighter.

“I’m here,” she whispered, “I’m here. 

Safe. Max was here and she was safe.


	5. i'll catch you when you fall, always will

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> max comforts el after her panic attack

Max doesn’t quite know how they got here, standing in the corner of Mike’s basement while the rest of the party stares. A feeling of righteous anger bubbles up inside her and she flips all of them off before taking El’s hand and leading her up the stairs into the kitchen.

Her best friend is still breathing hard and shaking, so Max puts a hand on her face and leaves it there a little too long before whispering, “I’m here. I’ve got you.”

At that, El falls into her and Max catches her with an unspoken promise.

_I’ll catch you when you fall. I always will, even if you don’t ask me to. I love…_

_No, no, no, no._

“Max,” El whimpers and then she’s crying into Max’s shirt again, gripping her like she needs her.

“I’ve got you,” Max repeats over and over again into El’s hair.

After El’s wiped the tears away and is leaning against the Wheeler counter in the aftermath of her breakdown, Max reaches out to grab her hand and ask, “What happened?”

“The Coca Cola. I thought… I thought…”

“Hey,” Max brushes her cheek and lets her fingers linger a little, “You don’t have to tell me.”

“I thought I was back at the lab,” her best friend whispers, staring down at the floor.

Max hasn’t heard a lot about El’s past, other than the secret and mysterious “escaped from Hawkin’s lab”, but she’s deduced things from the way her friend jumps a little bit when a door opens suddenly or people start yelling.

Max has made the solemn vow that she will singlehandedly rip those assholes to pieces if she ever gets close enough and she swears it again right then and there.

“They made me… practice on the cans like the one Lucas had.”

Max sees red when El speaks softly and quickly about what she’s been through, like she’s afraid the words will get lodged in her throat if she doesn’t get them out fast enough. Her fists clench and she makes a sound somewhere between a growl and roar.

“Max?”

“I am going to kill them,” she whispers with the anger of a thousand suns in her eyes.

El’s small smile in response makes her shiver.

“Thank you,” her best friend whispers and if Max hears I love you behind those words, well, that’s no one’s business except her own.

Without thinking, Max leans forward and presses a quick kiss to the girl’s forehead. It’s soft and chaste and she hopes it can say what she can’t out loud. Not yet, anyways. El looks at her, her eyes still brimming with tears and returns it with a brush of her lips against Max’s cheek, so soft and light that she’s convinced it was an angel or a ghost.

When the two of them walk back down the stairs hand in hand, Max’s face is still bright red, matching the color of her hair.

The boys are in a heated argument about the merits of Cheetos versus the cons of having them stain their fingers orange. Even though El drifts back over to Will and whispers something in his ear, she and Max make eye contact while the argument between Lucas and Dustin with Mike interjecting and Will laughing amps up.

God, boys are so stupid, Max things.

Girls , on the other hand… well, one girl in particular is absolutely _wonderful_.


	6. Hug

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> el talks to mike and they both realize they like other people.

El didn’t know what had come over her when she’d kissed Max’s cheek. Kissing wasn’t supposed to be for friends. Kissing was for boyfriends.

But when Max’s lips touched her forehead, El felt a jolt of electricity, and in that moment, all she saw was the girl in front of her and her beautiful face, and-- well, she couldn’t really stop herself.

But what did this mean?

After a whole childhood of being shielded from everything, even common information and normal, everyday functions, El always found herself on the hunt for answers. She was quick to learn the meanings of new words, and easily remembered them. She asked questions and didn’t stop until she got answers.

But this wasn’t exactly a question she could just ask.

Kissing was for boyfriends, and so El was biking to Mike’s house right now. Not to kiss him, but to talk to him, and ask if maybe he had any information. There were few people El fully trusted, and Mike was one. He was the first, actually. Ever since he’d given her a home on the rainy night they’d met, he’d always been someone she could look up to and trust.

She arrived at the Wheeler’s and nearly sprinted to the front door. She needed shade-- it was a hot day out-- as much as she needed to see Mike.

Mrs. Wheeler answered the door. Before she could talk, El explained, “It’s me, El...eanor. I need to… Can I see Mike?”

The woman nodded and told her “He’s in the basement”, but El was already going down the stairs.

She reached the bottom to find Mike holding a shoe, ready to strike. He lowered it when he saw El. “El? What are you doing here?” He was visibly confused and clearly a little uncomfortable.

“We need to talk.”

Those four words sent Mike into a spluttering, awkward mess. El let this go on for a few seconds before cutting him off. “Mike.”

He opened his mouth to speak, but ended up sighing and nodding. “I know. Things have been… weird. And I haven’t been there for you, and--”

“Mike. Can I kiss you?”

Now he was definitely confused. “Kiss me? I mean, sure, but--” He was cut off as El put her lips against his.

They broke apart. El had her answers. Kissing Mike had never felt the same as it did when she-- well, when she imagined kissing Max. It wasn’t that she didn’t like Mike. She definitely did. But kissing him didn’t fill her up, didn’t leave her wanting more.

She really liked it when Max kissed her. Even if it was just on the forehead. She really liked everything about Max, really. Her hair, her eyes, her snap-back comments and her fierce defending of El. El liked hugging Max. It felt like she was holding the whole world and everything important to her. She liked Max.

Well, Mike had a right to know.

“Mike… I like someone else.”

He didn’t look disappointed, just curious. “Oh. Who?”

“Um…” Should she tell him?

Yes. Mike could never hate her.

“Max.”

“Max? Wait, Max from our Party?” She nodded. There might as well have been a light bulb over Mike’s head for how obviously he connected everything. “So, that’s why…”

“I dumped you.”

He nodded. “Right.” His expression shifted. “I… I guess I shouldn’t be so mean to her.”

El had to physically stop herself from rolling her eyes. “Obviously.” He was just figuring this out?

“So… you… like her…” Mike’s eyes shifted. He clearly had something else to say.

“Spit it out.” El needed answers.

He spluttered, face turning a brilliant shade of red. “Spit it out? What do you…? How do you…?” 

Mike was silenced by a comforting look from El. “You can talk to me.” She hoped Mike knew that she really, truly meant this. She’d always be there to listen to him.

Mike bit his lip and looked at the floor. “I… like someone else, too.”

What? Who on earth… 

Then it hit her. Will. It had to be. It would explain how he always acted so still and awkward around Will, and the soft glances and the soft voice that he only had for El’s brother.

“Is it Will?”

Mike somehow turned even redder than before, and once again started sputtering. El silenced it with a hug.

They broke apart, and he hesitated before nodding.

“So… I guess we shouldn’t really date. I mean, if we both like other people.”

El nodded, happy that he said this before she had to explain.

They looked at each other with a new connection. As they hugged again, El doubted that this would break them apart. It would only make them closer.

They were interrupted by the sound of static.

“Code red! I repeat, code red! I need kitty litter, butter, and a wrench, ASAP! Come on people! This is not a drill!”

Mike raised his eyebrows as El burst out laughing. She felt like she could float.

She may have lost a boyfriend, but she gained a best friend.


	7. how can this be wrong when it feels so right?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> after getting an extremely weird code red call, max meets robin buckley and gains a new lesbian mentor.

Max rolls her eyes as Dustin’s voice crackles through the walkie talkie. 

“Code red! I repeat, this is a code red situation. Anyone with a wrench, kitty litter and copious amounts of butter needs to come to the home video immediately!” 

She doesn’t even question him at this point, just yells through the house that she’s going to use some butter for school, grabs a wrench from the garage and bikes over while cursing her friends for being such absolute idiots. 

When Max pulls into the parking lot, Will’s already standing outside and holding a bag of kitty litter. 

“Hey,” he says and she nods back at him. 

They’ve become awkwardly close given she keeps showing up at his house in the middle of the night and sometimes, when El and Dustin are having a dance-off and Lucas and Mike are arguing about whatever the hell they’re always gesturing wildly about, Max and Will make eye contact and hold back giggles. 

They walk inside together and instead of seeing Dustin getting into whatever trouble he’s stuck in now, there’s Robin from Scoops Ahoy standing behind the counter and looking bored but amused at the same time. 

“Do you know where Dustin is?” Max asks, avoiding eye contact because those blue eyes remind her of that night at the mall and listening to her best friend screaming while she stood there helplessly because there was nothing she could do. She stares anywhere else, like at the cardboard cut out of some movie star she doesn’t recognize. 

“He and Steve sprinted out of here a couple minutes ago,” Robin gestures towards the door. 

Max and Will look at each other and groan at the same time. While he wanders out in the direction Robin pointed, Max stays, frozen in place. For some reason, she can’t pick up her feet because the memories are rushing at her faster than she thought was possible. She thinks it’s because of Robin’s voice.

Hissing and footsteps echoing louder than they should and fireworks crackling and Robin’s fast talking, stories about soccer team and a car engine revving and a knife cutting into El’s skin and her screams that Max can’t escape and…. 

“You ok?” 

Max blinks and remembers that she’s not at the mall anymore. She’s standing in the middle of a home video store, breathing hard and clenching the wrench and butter (which squelches under her touch) in her fists while Robin stares at her. 

“Fine,” she mutters before her knees give out and she falls into the counter. 

Robin’s by her side in about 0.6 seconds, gripping her arm and holding her up. 

“What’s wrong?” she asks and Max doesn’t know how to tell her everything in a way that would make sense. 

Instead, she just replies, “I don’t know.” 

Robin nods and squeezes her forearm gently, giving a smile that makes Max feel like she’s not alone anymore, even though she’s always been, always will be. Isn’t that what her stepdad keeps telling her? That she’s lucky she’s still allowed in his house, because she’s not good enough for anything or anyone? That she’s got nowhere to run, because where would she go? 

The image of his face, leering at her and snarling, pops up in her head and suddenly, she can’t breathe because she’s thrown back to last night when she was cowering in the corner of her room and he was yelling at her again and she was so afraid that she couldn’t even scream.

But, Robin’s whispering in her ear and leading her outside, so she breathes the air in and closes her eyes to the memories, focusing instead on brown eyes and a smile like sunshine… 

No, no, no, no. 

“You wanna talk about it?” Robin asks and Max bites her lip. 

“I just… I was back there for a minute.” 

“You’re not there anymore,” she says, looking into Max’s eyes, “We’re safe, it’s over, we won. I promise.” 

The words don’t do anything, because Max just stares at the ground and wishes they were true. 

“Breathe with me, ok?” 

So, she does. Inhale, exhale and repeat until she can think straight again and she gives a weak smile while she thanks Robin for her help. 

“Any time. Steve’s children are… well, I guess I’m the weird aunt or something,” Robin laughs. 

Steve’s children. Max would protest, but she’s never had anyone choose her that willingly before. Even with the party… they’d just stalked her until she hung out with them. Some days, she doesn’t even know if they like her or if she’s just another one of their weird obsessions that managed to stick around. 

With El, it’s different. She doesn’t know why, but it is. It feels like what the movies say… 

No, no, no, no. 

Apparently, she says all of this out loud because Robin gives her a sad smile that says she knows exactly how Max feels. 

“It’s not a bad thing to like girls like that, you know.” 

Max is terrified of telling herself she’d rather kiss girls than boys because she’s always been shit at lying and everyone else would find out. 

Then, where would she be? 

Alone again, like she was before the party let her in. 

She can’t think about the confusion written all over her best friend’s face or the way El’s mouth would curl up in disgust when Max…. she just can’t. It would break her heart to realize that nobody’s going to love her back the way she wants, especially not the girl she wants more than anything.

So, she doesn’t think about it, doesn’t let herself. Unless, of course, her defenses slip and something creeps in, but even then, she stays on guard and blocks it out before it can get dangerous. 

“Yes, it is,” Max mutters and stuffs her hands into her pockets. Her face is flaming and she wishes she could have just shut her stupid mouth or not even have come to help Steve and Dustin at all. 

“You listen to me,” Robin says, her voice strong and passionate, “There is nothing wrong with being who you are and whoever says otherwise is an asshole, got it?” 

For some reason, there’s tears swelling up in Max’s eyes and she can’t speak because she’s afraid she’ll start crying. So, she just nods and gives a smile she hopes can express all her gratitude for this person she barely knows being willing to fight for her. 

Eventually, she just whispers, “Thank you.” 

“For what it’s worth, I’m a lesbian too. So, if you ever need to talk to someone… I know what it’s like and I’ve got your back, ok?” 

“Ok,” Max says and smiles for real this time. 

“We can kick the asses of homophobes together. I’m sure Steve would be happy to lend us his bat…” Robin starts. 

“What about my bat?” Steve asks, walking down the sidewalk with Dustin. 

“We’re gonna beat up homophobes with it. You in?” 

He hi fives Robin and says, “Hell yeah!”

“Wait…” Max stammers, “You…?” 

“I’m bi, so it’d be pretty hypocritical of me to not accept you,” Steve shrugs and smiles again. 

“What’s bi?” Dustin asks. 

“It’s when someone likes guys and girls,” Robin supplies and the curly haired boy actually gasps. 

“You can do that?!” he shouts and breaks into a wide grin. Max shushes him and glances around, looking to see people like her stepdad eavesdropping. 

She thanks Robin one more time, says goodbye to Steve and Dustin, hands them the butter just in case, even though it’s almost melted and laughs while they look at it, confused. Max almost has to laugh because Dustin’s the one who asked for it in the first place. 

“Yeah, we don’t need that anymore,” Dustin says and tries to hand it back to her but she’s already sprinting towards her bike and laughing, leaving him clutching the butter and groaning. 

“What the hell am I supposed to do with this?” he shouts after her and she shrugs.

As she bikes back home, she starts to think that maybe Robin’s right. Especially since Max might… might like girls and there’s no way the feeling she gets when El is around is wrong. How could it be when it feels so right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> robin is the lesbian aunt and would 100% take max under her wing. i will die on this hill.


	8. Photograph

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> el and nancy talk and el learns a new word.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i cannot express how cute this chapter is guys. we need more el and nancy bonding. @wandering_soul_with_a_writing_goal wrote this perfectly and i love it with all my heart. here's a break from the angst because sorry for last chapter :)

Since Mike didn’t have any of the things Dustin asked for except for butter (“I’m not biking all the way to the video store to bring him butter”), and Will would be bringing the materials from the Byers house, El and Mike decided to stay and hang out.

They’d just started to watch Star Wars when Mrs. Wheeler called for Mike. “Mike! Your Aunt Helen wants to talk to you!”

He groaned, pausing the movie. “Can it wait, Mom?”

“No, it can’t, Michael.” He rolled his eyes and stood up.

“I’ll make it quick,” he promised before rushing up the basement stairs.

Sometimes El wished she had a normal family. She wished she could receive birthday cards from grandparents, or get phone calls from aunts and uncles. Maybe even have a family reunion. But nothing about El’s life was normal.

According to all of her extended family, she had been dead before she was born.

Even though Mike said he would make it quick, the call stretched on for a long time. El found herself wandering the basement, looking at drawings on the walls that were too good to be Mike’s and examining old toys that were displayed on his desk.

Eventually, she was tired of being downstairs, and decided to come up. She didn’t know where she was going, but she knew she’d find something.

She reached the top and found herself climbing another set of stairs. She passed a bedroom that she knew to be Mike’s, and then found another room. Nancy’s.

The door was open and the lights were off. So, El went in.

She’d been in here before, when she’d first met Mike and was freshly escaped from the lab. She remembered being so shocked to see a girl her age in the photos on the wall, happy, smiling with friends. Having a normal life.

Now, El saw the same pictures. They didn’t look so far off from how El’s life was now.

Progress. That’s the word. Progress.

Hopper had taught her that word, along with many others. It was one of the first words she’d learned. He’d said it on the first day El ate breakfast at the table with him. A breakfast that wasn’t just Eggos.

“Would you look at that, kid? We’re making progress.”

“What is progress?”

He thought for a moment. “It’s when you’re in a better place than you were yesterday. It’s moving forward. Got it? That’s gonna be your word for the day. How’s that sound?”

She’d nodded, excited for a task.

Now, it took more than looking up a word to make her excited. She felt like other kids, who complained about homework.

Progress.

The door squeaked behind her and El whipped around. Nancy.

“El?”

“I’m… I’m just… I’m sorry.”

Nancy looked sympathetic. “No, it’s okay. I was just… surprised to see you. How are you?”

“Um. Fine.” Close enough to the truth.

“I thought you and Mike had broken up.”

“We did. I like someone else.” Why was she telling this to Nancy? Maybe it was easier to talk to another girl. Someone who’d been through… Well, someone who had been through some of the same things as her.

Nancy must have seen that El was eager for someone to talk to, because she turned on the light, closed her door, and sat on the bed. “Do you want to talk about it?”

El nodded much too eagerly. She sat on the bed next to Nancy.

She started to talk, but suddenly she didn’t know what to say, or if she should say anything. She barely knew how she felt anymore, and she was going to tell Nancy?

“Well…” Wait. This was her chance to ask questions. Maybe Nancy could help her. So, she asked. “Is it normal to want to kiss a girl?”

Nancy hesitated, then nodded. “Yes, of course it’s normal.” Pause. “A lot of people don’t think that it’s okay. They think that those people should be… well, they think horrible things should happen to them. But that’s not true. Love doesn’t have a specific gender.”

Hmm. “Is there a word?”

Nancy nodded. “There are a lot of words. Lesbian is when you’re a girl who loves girls. Gay is when you’re a boy who loves boys. And then there’s bisexual, where you like both.” She let El absorb this new knowledge before adding, “I’m bisexual.”

“Really?”

Nancy nodded. “Yeah. I’ve liked some boys and some girls.”

Bisexual. El couldn’t quite tell if it fit. She’d definitely wanted to kiss boys in the past-- there as a time when she daydreamed about kissing Mike-- but now she liked Max.

“Can it change?”

Nancy considered this. It seemed new, because she didn’t have an immediate answer. “I don’t know. The real thing that matters isn’t what you call yourself. You don’t have to like every girl or every boy. Sometimes there’s just that one person.” Nancy blushed, probably thinking about her one person.

El thought about who her person was, or who she wanted it to be. Max.

Why did she immediately think of Max?

Maybe it was because whenever El had a particularly bad nightmare, Max was there. Maybe it was because they fit perfectly together, and when they hugged each other, they absorbed the other’s pain and filled each other with laughter. Maybe it was because when El thought about Max, everything became okay. Since Hopper’s… well, since then, she’d gotten closer than ever with the redhead. They’d seen each other at their absolute worst, and you can’t get much closer than that.

Things were getting better. The nightmares that terrorized El every night were starting to calm down, and the racing thoughts in her head dissolved into the new ones about Max’s beautiful face… 

Footsteps. The door opened. Mike was standing there, looking a little worn out. “She made me explain my new campaign! Like, the whole thing, from start to finish. I hope you didn’t hear that, El, because there were some spoilers.”

He must have just noticed that his sister and his ex girlfriend were talking together. “You guys are friends?”

Nancy smiled. “Why not?” She turned to El. “Wanna be friends?”

El smiled and nodded.

Mike stared at them blankly, as if he’d been shocked so many times that nothing could phase him. “Hey El, wanna finish that movie?”

“Yes.” She pulled Nancy into a hug before leaving her room, eager to tell Mike the new words she learned and maybe help him figure things out, too.


	9. the only good dreams i have are those with you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> after ending up at the byers house yet again, max finally realizes that she's in love with el. now, she has to figure out what the hell to do about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> since you got some bicon el and nancy last chapter, be prepared for ALL THE ANGST. i'm not joking when i say i sobbed when i wrote this part.

Tonight, Max doesn’t dream of the mall and footsteps and fireworks and tentacles and screaming. Tonight, she dreams of a warm hand in hers, lingering touches that send sparks through her entire body, hot chocolate, laughter for no reason and smiles that feel like a piece of heaven. 

When she ends up at the Byers’ doorstep anyway, she doesn’t even question herself. 

El lets her in, looking more exhausted than usual and without prompting, collapses into her as soon as Max blinks. 

Max holds her as tightly as she can, hurting so much for this beautiful, wonderful girl that has seen far too many horrors and whose scars are covered by the smile that makes Max feel so damn alive for once in her life. 

She just hopes that will be enough to save her best friend. 

They stumble inside together, having perfected the dance of walking while intertwined and Max whispers the first things that come to mind when she thinks of El. 

“You’re so brave and so strong and the most wonderful person I know. I’m here for you, ok?” 

And then, she says it all over again to drive the point home because she wants El to understand that she would do anything and everything for her without even being asked. 

“Thank you,” El mumbles when they sit on the couch together and Max strokes her hair. 

She just holds her tighter in response, wondering why her best friend even feels the need to say that when she’s literally gone to hell and back for Max. It makes her guilty to think of how far she pushed El when they were playing around with her powers. Even though she knows that Eleven understands her own boundaries better than everyone else, maybe if she hadn’t come up with all those stupid games or maybe if… 

The what ifs never get anyone anywhere, so Max focuses on the moment and stands up to start making hot chocolate. After all these nights of nightmares and clinging to each other, she’s become sort of an expert at it. 

El talks about the new words she learned and the latest episode of Days of Our Lives, even though Max can’t keep up with the characters or their intricate stories. 

As they chatter and share smiles, Will stumbles into the kitchen and Max holds out a cup for him. He mutters his thanks and sits down at the kitchen table next to El, who sends a soft grin his way. Since she’s been living at the Byers house, she’s started to blend into their family. 

Max has mixed feelings about that. 

She’s happy that El has people who love her and that she finally feels safe again, but there’s this bitter whisper in the back of her head that says El won’t belong to her anymore, that she’ll leave like everyone else when she realizes there’s something better, that Max isn’t good enough for her and it’s only a matter of time… Max just wants to hold on for as long as she can. 

Will asks a question about a rather complicated plotline and El launches into a full-fledged explanation of a character’s arc. Her face is bright and she’s laughing like she hasn’t since she dumped Mike’s ass that day at the mall before everything went to hell. 

Max’s heart flutters just a little bit to see her best friend back to normal again and when she brings the hot coco back to the table and El smiles at her with those eyes? She’s so far gone that it’s strange she didn’t realize she was falling until she’s here, drowning in it. Max blushes and tries to stop her face from heating up, but that just makes it worse, so she puts the heels of her hands on her chin and pretends like she’s just relaxing that way. 

Max is lost in the music of El’s voice, so once she finishes talking and waits for a reply, Max just nods, dazed. 

Will raises an eyebrow at her like he knows exactly what’s running through her head. 

“Sorry, what?” Max asks and blinks out of her trance. 

“Do you want to go get ice cream tomorrow with me, Will and Mike?”

Max just dreamily sighs in response and then jumps when Will kicks her under the table. She shoots him a glare and he just sips his hot chocolate like he doesn’t know why she’s sending laser beams at him through her eyes.

“I mean, yes, I’d love to!” she blurts out when she remembers how human beings are supposed to act. She can’t help it. She forgets how to breathe when El’s around. 

Max doesn’t know who she is without El there to show her. 

Some time around 3am, they wander back into the living room and curl up on the couch together. Max lays her head on El’s chest and listens to her heartbeat, deciding that she’s found a new favorite song. As she closes her eyes and her best friend runs her hands through her red hair, she tries to tell herself that this can’t be happening. 

Max can’t be in love with Eleven Hopper, because if she admits it, she’s going to crash and burn harder than the messes she’s already made. What would El want to do with her- the reckless, wild zoomer that breaks everything she touches? She’s lucky enough to have these stolen moments and if that’s all she can get? That’s enough for her. 

So, no, she’s definitely not in love. Absolutely not. 

But, then, she hears El snoring and feels her chest going up and down as she sleeps and she knows the truth. 

Max’s heart is already beating in time with El’s, her arms are empty when the other girl’s not in them, the only good dreams she has are those brown eyes, her destiny is written the same way as El’s name. It’s the one thing that fills the hole left in her chest, the one thing that reminds her she isn’t completely screwed up, the one thing that makes her realize that she’s still human, the one thing that makes her forget about the nightmares and her dead brother-not-brother and her stepfather’s anger. 

It’s the one thing that keeps her alive when the shadows try to pull her into the darkness again.


	10. waffles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> el and will talk about what love is over breakfast which is, of course, waffles.

Wow, El could not believe how much she loved cuddling.

Maybe it only mattered when it was with a certain someone.

Ever since her talk with Nancy, she’d been running the words through her head. Mostly bisexual. But El thought it would fit more if there was a word that meant I like girls a lot but also a couple boys. Yes.

Max was already gone when El had woke up, but she couldn’t stop thinking about Max, with her beautiful hair and huggable arms and kissable face and how nice it was to be with her and escape the nightmares…

“El?”

She’d been zoning off in the middle of the hallway. Oops.

Snapping out of it, she focused on Will as he explained the plan. “I talked to Mike and Max. They’ll be over here at about 1.”

She nodded, checking the clock in the hall. It was 10:02. Strangely enough, she never slept in late, even when she didn’t find sleep until after 3 AM.

“Well, there’s waffles if you want them.” She nodded again and followed Will to the kitchen.

As they sat and ate their breakfast in silence, there was an unspoken tension between them. El felt nervous to see Max on… was it a double date? She didn’t know much about dating, and she hadn’t even thought about what she was implying when she’d asked the night before. Now, she couldn’t stop overthinking it. Maybe Will was thinking the same thing.

She swallowed a bite of waffle and looked at Will, trying to decipher how he was feeling. As behind as she was, she was quick to learn how to read body language.

He was looking straight down at his plate, bouncing his leg and fidgeting with his fork. Nervous. Just like she was.

So, should she talk to him about it?

“Will.”

He looked up, snapping out of wherever he’d been. “Yeah, El?”

“I’m nervous.”

He sighed. “Me too. I mean, you’re probably nervous to see Mike, right?”

Mike? He must have thought they were still dating. “Um, no.” She pressed her lips together. “Max.”

She saw the confusion register on Will’s face, then settle into bewilderment. “Oh. I mean, I know that she…” he gave up on the sentence. “I thought you were in love with Mike.”

So did she. “Me too. Now I don’t know what love is.” She struggled a bit through the sentence; it was a long one.

Will chuckled, shaking his head. “Me neither.”

Then he seemed to think about it, and his expression showed… sadness?

They were talking about love. Why would he be sad?

“Will.” He was pulled out of his thoughts. “Friends don’t lie.”

He took in a breath and looked around. Nervous, again. But this time, nervous for a different reason.

“Will?”

“Um. I guess I kind of know about… love.”

El was curious. “Really?”

He slowly nodded, pushing his plate away. El followed suit. Food was less important.

“So, what is love like?” she pressed. She was eager to hear Will’s thoughts on the topic, so that maybe she’d get closer to knowing it for herself.

He thought about it, then spoke slowly. “Love… is like, when thinking about someone brightens your day. You can’t even picture a world without them, and you don’t want to live in a world where you can’t be with them. It’s… when every little thing they do makes you smile. And they can also make you blushy and awkward and… break your heart.” His eyes cast downward.

Max.

Other than the ‘break your heart’ part, everything Will said fit perfectly.

Every time Max popped into El’s head it brought a wide smile to her face and nothing but happy thoughts. Even though they’d only met this summer, she couldn’t even begin to imagine a world without the feisty, redheaded zoomer with huggable arms and a heart of gold. Everything Max said sent El into a burst of giggles. And El definitely blushed in the girl’s presence.

Snapping El from her thoughts, Will added, “Not that I know from… personal experience. Or whatever. I mean…” his cheeks turned pink, and he went back to eating his waffle.

Suddenly, everything made sense. All the times when Will’s eyes seemed to be glued to Mike, the way he always gave Mike his drawings, their close, intimate glances and subtle touches when the two thought no one was looking. How Will was always overly excited to go to Mike’s. The way they always seemed to sit next to each other whenever they played D&D.

Oh my god. These oblivious idiots. Oblivious was a word Jonathan had taught her, and it fit this situation perfectly.

But El was suddenly concerned. Had Mike broken Will’s heart? What happened? Did it… did it have anything to do with her? Even though Will didn’t seem too upset by mentioning it, she couldn’t help but feel a little bit guilty. It must have been resolved, or so far in the past that he’d buried it down. El had unfortunately realized that Will had a habit of burying his emotions.

Will finished his breakfast and stood to leave the table, but before he could leave, El spoke. “Wait!” he stopped, and she couldn’t decide what to say.

So, she settled on, “I understand.”

They shared a glance and he seemed to understand what she meant. He looked away awkwardly. “Um, thanks, El.” Then he hurried away from the table.

El couldn’t help feeling a little proud for figuring it out. But there were more pressing matters, like her new discovery.

I am in love with Max.

Thinking the words made her feel blushy and fluttery, but also filled her with a small jolt of fear. What if she really was in love? The thought scared her, especially because of bad things she’d heard about people who like the same gender as them. El didn’t really understand it. Why did it matter if you loved a boy or a girl or everyone or no one. She also just felt scared of the concept of love. Love came with expectations. It was a deep emotion, and El didn’t really understand it. Was she going down that path? Was she ready?

She tried the words again. I am in love with Max. They didn’t feel too far off the second time.

Will wasn’t ever really wrong about things. And somehow, what he said didn’t even feel new. Looking back, she couldn’t even imagine a world without loving Max. She couldn’t picture a reality where she did not fall for this gorgeous, clever, kind, smart girl.

She only wondered if Max felt the same.


	11. you make me feel alive and it's so damn wonderful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> while waiting for el and will to get ice cream, max and mike talk.

Max sits on the front porch of the Byers house and sighs. Joyce opened the door a few minutes ago with an apologetic smile and said that El and Will were still getting ready. 

Max can sympathize with that- it took her twenty minutes to pick out a shirt. 

But, here she is, swinging her legs back and forth and waiting anxiously for someone to open the door. She thinks that it’s worse to not know than to be 100% certain that something terrible is going to happen. Speaking from the perspective of someone who lives with Neil Hargrove and who’s been involved in some supernatural shit, she’s an expert in both categories. 

Max looks up as a bike pulls into the driveway and there’s Mike Wheeler, striding up towards the Byers house. 

She almost groans out loud. 

Out of the entire party, she and Mike are the ones who don’t get along. Especially since he was convinced she “corrupted” El or some bullshit the last time she actually talked to him and she’s ignored what he had to say ever since. 

Apparently, luck isn’t on her side today, because now she can’t slip off into a conversation with Dustin about whatever cool new obsession he has or tease Lucas about his dorky shirts. 

“Hey,” he mutters, sitting down next to her. 

“Wheeler,” she responds, not bothering to look at him. 

“Here’s the thing,” Mike starts and she rolls her eyes, “No, no, listen to me. El and I talked and I realized that I’ve kinda been an asshole…” 

“Kind of?! You treated her like she was your property, Mike! She didn’t even know what she liked!” Max is furious remembering the way El had asked that when they wandered through the mall together. 

He flinches, “You’re right. A huge asshole.” 

“Mike Wheeler admitting he was wrong? What’s next- pigeons tap dancing?” 

“Don’t get too used to it,” Mike laughs. 

“So,” she thinks of a way to phrase the question that doesn’t sound extremely rude now that they’re not worst enemies, “Are you two…?” 

“No, no, no,” he interrupts her and shakes his head, “We’re just friends. I like someone else.”   
Max lets out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding and immediately tries to cover it with a cough which leads to her choking on her own saliva. 

“You good?” Mike asks and she flips him off, because what else is she supposed to say? 

Thank God, because I’m in love with her. Or, better yet, what about so, I can ask her out now, right? You won’t be mad? Max almost laughs out loud thinking about it and it’s hilarious because she’s never been this happy in the company of Mike Wheeler. 

They banter for a few minutes more, going back and forth about whether peaches or cherries are better. She really doesn’t know where the conversation came from, but apparently, Nancy’s been buying a lot of peaches lately, so he starts talking about how they’re delicious and so much better than the cherries that his mom usually gets, when she intervenes with a come back and here they are, gesturing wildly and teasing each other when El and Will finally come out. 

“So, are you guys friends now?” Will asks and Mike looks up, startled. For a moment, Max swears that he turns bright red and she’s going to have to bring that up later because it’s hilarious. 

“Maybe?” Mike squeaks and oh. 

Everything falls into place- the little smiles he has reserved just for Will, the way he caresses the drawings that his friend hands him, even the blushing. I like someone else. Wasn’t that what he said? Max feels a twinge of satisfaction as she puts it together. 

“I’m glad,” El grins and grabs Max’s hand, pulling her up from the steps. 

“Ice cream?” Max says and tries to make sure her voice doesn’t crack at all. She doesn’t want to pull a Mike and totally expose herself to everyone. 

As the four teens jump on their bikes, El gives her this soft and lovely smile that sends shivers down her spine and makes her feel so happy she could scream out of joy. Max would stand out in the rain on her porch for thousands of years if it meant seeing it one more time. 

Pedaling down the street with the wind in her hair and the girl she loves in front of her, Max feels so alive that demodogs could descend on the town and she wouldn’t even flinch. 

Feelings are pouring out of every part of her and she bikes harder so that maybe she’ll have an excuse for the reason her heart’s beating so fast. As she soars past El, she looks up at Max and giggles. Then, Max is laughing too and they’re staring at each other like nothing else matters and then, Will starts chuckling and Mike joins in. 

“What’s so funny?” her ex-worst enemy now turned maybe friend asks after catching his breath.   
“Everything,” Will responds and the two boys look at each other. It’s so sweet and yet, intense, that Max has to look away and stare at El instead. If she’s got an excuse, she’s sure as hell gonna use it. Her best friend is staring back at her and they share one of those smiles again and Max feels like she’s being burned alive, but in a good way. 

When they drive past the home video store, Max sees Robin in the window and her smile gets even wider because she’s reminded that this love is beautiful, that it’s right. She hopes that Robin might get someone who makes her feel like this someday, who feels it back. 

Max looks at El’s brown eyes sparkling in the sunshine, her smile glowing and her hair bouncing in the wind and she’s so in love. In love with being free and being infinite and being alive, but most importantly, she’s in love with this girl in front of her. This beautiful human being that makes her feel things she didn’t know were possible, that makes her better than she was, that makes her realize it’s ok to love who you are and love anyone you want to because it’s just so damn wonderful. 

Max has been running her whole life to find love that she’s dreamed about since she first learned how to talk, even if she’d slap anyone who called her a romantic. But, now, she understands that it’s right in front of her. 

Love is the girl that saves your life countless times over with the best hugs and an obsession with soap operas. Love is forgiving someone for making stupid mistakes and saying things they didn’t mean. Love is sharing hot chocolate in the middle of the night and raised eyebrows at your friends’ stupidity and small moments of happiness. Love is falling asleep on someone’s chest and waking up knowing that they’re still there. 

Love is living with every part of your soul and knowing that you belong somewhere. Love is looking at three people biking by your side and wondering how you’d live without them, starting to laugh and not being able to stop. 

The four of them race each other across town, laughing like they’re invincible and Max wonders if, with El around, maybe she is.


	12. vanilla with rainbow sprinkles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> el, max, will and mike go out for ice cream together and el says... some things

“Vanilla with sprinkles, please.”

The man behind the counter nodded and grabbed a waffle cone. El turned to Max, head full of thoughts, trying to read her love’s best friend’s expression.

She wanted so badly to just forget everything. Forget who she was, forget who she loved, forget that who she loved was her best friend and El didn’t know what to do.

The man handed El her cone and she nodded in thanks, passing Max to join Will and Mike at the register. They all had their own money, even though Mike offered to pay for Will, and then awkwardly said that he’d also pay for El, and then Max asked why he wasn’t paying for her as well, and finally they just agreed to buy their own ice cream.

When they all got their ice cream and paid, they went outside to find a tree to sit under.

“Mmm…” One of El’s favorite things about summer was ice cream. How could she not love it?

Yes, she had a huge sweet tooth.

They all ate in silence for a few minutes, sitting in the cool shade and watching cars go by. El was leaning against a tree next to Mike. Will was sitting and Max was lying down. El took this opportunity to admire her soft, beautiful features, like her hair that fell down and framed her face like a golden picture frame, and the blue eyes that would crinkle in the corners when she laughed, which she didn’t do enough.

El was so far gone, and she barely even knew it.

Max took a break from licking her cone to talk. “When I was in California, there was this amazing place that was only a few blocks away from my house.” (Even her voice was beautiful, the way she spoke in a soft tone, just letting the words fall.) “It had these crazy flavors, like Unicorn Cake and Martian Marshmallow and Playdough.”

“Playdough?” El thought that was a toy, not food.

“Well, it’s not real playdough. It’s cookie dough, but it has food dye, and it’s really good.” El could tell that Max was lost in a happy memory. Which made El smile, because usually when Max told her about California, it was a sad one, or a memory too vague for Max to have emotion about. But everything usually had a bitterness to it. This was… sweet. Like vanilla ice cream.

“That sounds awesome.” Will was also clearly lost in some thoughts of his own. Probably remembering his own favorite ice cream place. Of course, he’d had a normal childhood. All of them had. They all got to learn how to ride a bike, and go swimming in ice cold water, and try new flavors of ice cream.

El wished she knew what that was like.

Mike smiled and looked at El. “I’ve eaten real playdough once.”

El scoffed, unable to stop herself from smiling at him. This idiot who was her best friend.

Of course, Max was her best friend, but… well, El hoped they could be more.

Max sat up. “You’re shitting me, Wheeler. No way would you be brave enough to do that. Stupid, maybe, but brave? No.”

El saw Will chuckle from the corner of her eye. Mike rolled his eyes. “I’ll have you know, I was three, and I did do it. It tasted exactly like it smells.”

El’s ‘curiosity door’ (as Dustin called it) was open. “Did you swallow it? What did it feel like?”

Soon, Mike was telling the whole story in full detail about the time he ate playdough at age three. Will kept cracking up, Max kept shaking her head in disbelief, and El just listened in awe. (she also found her eyes resting on Max… more than they should.)

Max must have noticed El’s staring, because she met her eyes with a concerned look. “El? What’s up?”

Now was her chance. Her chance to do what, exactly? She didn’t quite know.

“I… Do you know what bisexual means?”

Everyone quieted. Mike gave her a wondering but warning stare.

El waited for someone to talk, but no one did. So, she continued.

“It’s… when you like boys and girls.”

Max was looking down at the grass, pressing her hand into it and moving the blades around. Will was curiously awaiting her next words. Mike looked about ready to bury his face into his hands.

El recklessly went on.

“Me and Mike talked about it, and we figured out that he’s that, and so am I…”

“El!” Mike screeched. Oh no. Did she say too much? Mike put his hand on his forehead and grimaced, face turning red. Will was eyeing him the whole time, trying to stop a hopeful smile from growing on his face. Max was looking up now, but avoiding El’s eyes.

There was no going back. She had to do this.

El turned to Max. “Um… I just…”

Everything she’d ever felt about Max hit El like a ton of bricks. Every detail she’d noticed about her, every moment where she felt she could burst from happiness if she could just keep holding her hand, every time when she was recovering from nightmares and just needed one of her hugs to ground her. Every time El felt nervous or excited to see Max. Every time she wanted to scream and cry, fighting a battle inside of her own head.

She just had to know.

“Do you like girls?”


	13. i wish i was brave, but i just run

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> after el asks max if she likes girls, max freaks out and bolts, then has a conversation with will about love and acceptance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: this chapter made me ugly cry. well, the whole story did, but this part in particular was like... really bad, so make sure you have those tissues, friends!

No, no, no, no. 

Do you like girls?

El’s question echoes in Max’s head and she can’t breathe, can’t think, can’t see. How did El know? Was she… was she spying? Did her powers come back without her telling Max? 

Why would she? 

Now, she’s going to realize just how messed up and broken and terrible Max is and she’s going to leave, like everyone else and… and… 

Max doesn’t want to be alone anymore. She doesn’t want to have to pretend not to feel things, doesn’t want to have to swallow everything down because she’s afraid. She doesn’t want to go back to that house that suffocates her with the man who’s already covered her in bruises. 

But, it’s too late. 

She can’t breathe, can’t think, can’t see because the walls are closing in and the floor is shaking and her soul is shattering into a million pieces and her heart is being smashed over and over and over and over and over and over…. 

“Max?” El asks and blinks at her. 

“I can’t…” she starts and she’s trying to talk, but the words are stuck in her throat and when she tries to get them out, they slice her up from the inside. 

“I can’t…” Max repeats it over and over as she backs up, turns on her heel and runs away. 

Max used to tell herself she was brave, but she realizes now as she gets on her bike and finally lets the tears fall that she’s a coward. The girl she wishes she was would have grabbed El by the shirt collar and kissed her speechless. The girl she wishes she was would have kept her head up and said, “Hell yeah I do.” 

The girl she is pedals down the street as hard as she can and sobs until she can’t see anymore and she has to pull over to wipe the tears away so she doesn’t crash. 

As Max crumples next to her bike and curls up on the ground, rocking back and forth and clutching her knees to her chest, she hears someone walking up to her and when she opens her eyes, Will is sitting next to her like this is perfectly normal. 

“I’m gay,” he tells her, without looking. He says matter of factly, like it doesn’t even matter. 

Max wishes she were as strong as he is. 

“It… it took me a while, because my dad… he used to call me all these terrible names and slap me around for only hanging out with Mike and even though he’s a terrible person, I was so worried about disappointing him that I didn’t... “ Will trails off and then laughs, “It’s funny because everything he said turned out to be true.” 

Max knows exactly what he’s talking about. The gates to the memories she tried to block off are opening again and she’s standing in the living room, terrified, as Neil’s red in the face and screaming at her, calling her things like the d-word and saying she’ll never be good enough for any man, saying she might as well just die instead of giving the world one more queer to deal with. She remembers that was the first time he hit her and Billy helped her afterwards, cleaning the cuts and telling her that it didn’t matter what he said.. 

That was the only time her brother-not-brother looked at her like he didn’t hate her. 

Sometimes, she misses him so hard it hurts when things get bad and she hears the glass breaking, the shouting, the doors slamming. But, she knows that he wasn’t a good person either because he hurt Lucas and he hurt her. She knows this and yet… and yet… 

He wasn’t Neil, wasn’t even close. He was just as broken as she is and even though he took it out on her… he apologized in the end. 

Now, here she is with a boy who understands everything, but he’s able to own who he is like it’s just a fact, not something to be afraid of. If Will can do it, she can too. She might not be a mage or a paladin or even a wizard like the rest of her friends- the only thing she’s really good at is zooming away from everything she’s ever known. 

But, she wants to be better. El makes her want to be better, and for her, Max will try. 

“Me too,” Max whispers and that’s the first time she’s said it aloud. It feels right.


	14. mother

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> el comes home and has a panic attack, then is comforted by joyce who is an amazing mom

Why did Max run off?

She probably knows. She definitely knows and she was disgusted because you’re just friends and you’re not supposed to like her. That’s what everyone says.

No. Max cared about El. She’d never…

She hates you, she was using you, she’ll never talk to you again.

No, no, no…

You might as well go back to the lab-

“No!” El screamed.

Joyce burst into the room. “Sweetie, are you okay?” Her voice was high and antsy with worry.

El was curled in a ball on the floor, tears streaming down her face. She didn’t know how she got there, or when she started crying.

Joyce knelt down, wrapping her arms around El. She sunk into them. Joyce was warm, and smelled like cigarette smoke and cookies.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you, I’m here, just breathe…”

Safe. El was safe.

They sat like that for five minutes, and El slowly felt herself calm down.

BEEP. A timer went off in the kitchen. Joyce didn’t budge.

“Shouldn’t you…” El asked, voice shaky.

Joyce looked down, face full of love and comfort. “Don’t worry about it, sweetie.” Then she called, “Jonathan! Could you get that please!” El heard a faint “yeah” from the kitchen.

A few more seconds passed before Joyce asked, “Do you wanna talk about it?”

Did she want to talk about it? Was there an ‘it’ to talk about?

No, I’m just worried. I messed everything up, and my best friend hates me now. And I’m broken and she’s the only one who can fix me, but now she probably hates me…

Apparently she was saying that allowed, because Joyce was muttering “Oh, honey…” and El was crying again and being pulled into a tight hug.

It’s good to have a mom.

“I just…” Every word was painful. Everything was painful. “I asked… something, but it doesn’t even matter. I’m… I’m broken,” she admitted for the first time.

“El, sweetie… You’re not broken. You’ve been hurt… But you’re healing. Every day.”

El hadn’t thought of it like that. Healing.

“How…” El didn’t know how to finish. How do I heal? How do you know? How do I end the pain? 

Joyce sighed. “It will come with time.”

“How do you know?” El found it hard to have hope.

A meaningful silence hung over the room. Then, Joyce started to speak.

“You know how you’ve never met Will and Jonathan’s dad?”

El nodded, not knowing where this was going.

“He… He hurt me. He hurt us.”

El gasped softly. Because how dare he. She felt a flare of rage.

“And after we got away, it felt like nothing would ever be okay. It felt like he broke me. But now, look at me. I have two beautiful sons and a beautiful daughter.” Joyce smiled at El and she did too. Because she was her daughter. “And we’re all… Well, we’ve obviously been through hell, but we don’t let him affect us anymore. That whole time, we were healing. And I didn’t even know it.” She chuckled.

El started talking, cautiously but curious. “Does it still hurt?”

“Yes. I don’t think it will ever stop. But it hurts a lot less.”

El sighed. She felt better. She felt like, for once, maybe she wasn’t broken.

She felt like, maybe she really was healing. And, as much as she didn’t want to, she could do it alone if she must.

She really didn’t want to do it alone.

She wanted people to be with her.

She wanted Max to be with her, helping her the whole way.


	15. watch me bleed- just another reminder that i'm still here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> max comes out to the party and then runs

Max walks down the stairs to Mike’s basement and smiles when she hears laughter floating up towards her, as well as Mike yelling about something or another. 

When everyone comes into view, El is sitting in the corner and laughing hysterically while he paces back and forth with his face bright red. Max slips in next to Dustin and raises a questioning eyebrow at him. 

“Lucas said the sun is a planet and he’s been going off for the past twenty minutes.” 

“DO PLANETS REVOLVE AROUND OTHER PLANETS, LUCAS? NO, THEY DO NOT!” Mike shouts and El giggles harder. Max starts laughing too- she can’t help it. 

Soon, Lucas is throwing his head back, Dustin’s chuckling and when Will laughs, Mike stops glaring and turns extremely red. Of course, that only makes Max laugh harder, which gets everyone else rolling on the floor too until they’re all clutching each other and breathing hard, letting out bits of Mike’s passionate speech as their sides ache. 

Max is so full of happiness that she feels like she might burst. 

But, then, she looks at El, with her eyes brighter than all the stars in the sky and that smile that makes Max feel alive and she falls in love all over again. Something inside her breaks a little bit because she just knows that her best friend could never feel the same way. 

Max isn’t special or brilliant or wonderful. She’s not horrible, by any means, but if you were comparing her to El Hopper? She’d be somewhere down by the quarry as El rides the clouds. 

She doesn’t realize she’s gone silent until Dustin elbows her and asks, “What’s wrong?” 

Max could go on for days about everything that’s completely wrong- the house she lives in feels less like home than the place she’s standing now, her stepdad tells her every night that she deserves to die (and yes, most of the time, she thinks he’s right), she can’t go to sleep without hearing her best friend screaming and seeing her brother-not-brother die over and over, she can’t just go to the mall with the girl she’s in love with because the Russians built an interdimensional gate underneath it and of course, a freaking monster destroyed it… there’s so many things that she wants to scream, but that wouldn’t be fair to her friends. 

“Nothing. I’m fine,” she snaps back and he goes back to talking with Lucas about the crazy amount of D&D questions Erica has. 

While everybody else goes back to normal, Max stares off into space and sighs. 

She wishes she were good enough, wishes she could make El feel butterflies in her stomach and fluttering in her chest the way Max does, wishes she could sleep without her best friend by her side, wishes that she didn’t rely on soft smiles and fingertips brushing her wrist to make it through the day. 

“Max?” 

Mike’s voice snaps her out of her self-loathing. 

“What?” Max asks and it comes out harsher than she means it to.

“You good? We kinda lost you for a minute there,” he sounds actually worried and she takes a deep breath. 

“Just… stuff.” 

“Hey,” Mike puts a hand on her shoulder, “If you ever want to talk about… stuff, you can talk to me, ok?” 

“Thanks, Wheeler,” Max gives him a small smile. 

Will comes over and asks, “Everything ok?” 

“Yeah,” Mike and Max say at the same time and then hi-five without looking. 

“You’re friends now?!” Lucas shouts from the other side of the room and Max flips him off.

After a D&D session that involves Lucas attempting to marry a sphinx, Dustin forgetting he has wings to carry the others over a chasm, Max repeatedly slamming her head into a table, El asking questions that even Mike doesn’t know the answer to and Mike and Will scooting closer and closer together until they’re practically touching, El comes up to Max and asks, “Are you mad at me?” 

“What do you mean?” Max replies, already confused. How’d she give off that impression? 

“After I… asked if you liked girls… ummm… you just kind of left and I didn’t know…” El bites her lip and looks at the ground, her eyes already welling up with tears. 

“Hey,” Max puts a hand on her shoulder, “I’m not mad, ok? Don’t worry.”

“Promise?”

“Well… the reason I got so upset is that…” Max takes a deep breath and focuses on looking at the stairs instead of her best friend’s face. Everyone suddenly goes silent for once and their eyes drift to her, like they already know she’s going to say something important. 

“I like girls!” Max blurts out and before she can analyze El’s reaction of a mixture between a scream and a squeal, she turns towards the stairs and bolts. 

“We support you!” Dustin shouts as she sprints towards Mike’s front door and she screams her thank you over her shoulder before she gets outside and she can press the heels of her hands into her eyes. For some reason, since the weight she didn’t even know she had until a few days ago has been lifted, she doesn’t know what to do but sob. 

So, she sits next to her bike in the Wheelers’ driveway and cries with her head in her hands until she couldn’t find her way home even if she wanted to. 

As Max picks herself up and starts to hop on her bike again, Steve’s car pulls up beside the mailbox with him and Nancy screaming along to ABBA music while Jonathan rolls his eyes and pretends to be annoyed. 

“Hey, Max,” Steve rolls down his window, “What’s up?” 

So, she tells him, because he said he’d help her beat up homophobes and besides, it’s already bursting out of her anyways and she doesn’t want to hold back anymore. 

“I… I think I’m… I mean, I am… what’s the word for gay, but when you’re a girl?” Max stumbles over her words and bites her tongue as the three teens look at her. 

“Lesbian,” Nancy supplies and Max nods. 

“That! I’m a… lesbian,” she takes the word and tastes it on her tongue. It feels… good. Like every time she admitted a truth to herself, that was a small victory. Saying it aloud to Will and then again, again, again feels even better. 

“Cool. I’m bisexual,” Steve replies like she’d just told him the sky was blue. 

“You are?!” Jonathan shouts and everyone turns to stare at him. 

“You got a problem with that?” 

“No,” Will’s brother sputters and looks at Nancy for help, who just shrugs at him and he continues, “I mean, I’m bi too, that’s all.” 

“Oh,” Steve’s blushing too now and Max almost groans out loud. Boys are so stupid! 

They stare at each other for a few minutes until Nancy clears her throat and adds in, “I’m bi too, for what it’s worth.” 

“Ok,” Max smiles a little bit and then gets on her bike. 

As she starts to pedal out of the driveway, she thinks she hears El calling after her, but it’s probably just the wind. When she reaches the hill before her neighborhood, she lifts her legs up and screams with everything she has, feeling like she could be anything. 

Then, she remembers the sound that El made and she reminds herself, well, almost anything. 

So, she screams louder and bikes harder, thinking that maybe if she doesn’t slow down, this feeling won’t stop. And even when she’s falling in slow motion, slamming into the ground and feeling a sting all over her hands, even when she’s holding them up and watching blood run down off of her palms, Max realizes that she is a lesbian and in love with her best friend and she is alive and it all feels so damn good.


	16. her eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> after max runs off, el struggles with what to do next

“Max! Max, wait!” El hopped on her bike and pedaled as fast as she could. The scar on her leg from the Monster burned, but she didn’t care. She needed Max. She needed to talk to her. She needed to apologize, and explain, and just see her gorgeous hair and beautiful eyes and--

“Hey, El!” She turned and Steve Harrington in a car. How long have they been following me? “Are you okay? Do you need a ride?”

She thought about it. Yes. I need to go there and I can’t bike fast enough, she’s too fast, she’s a zoomer and I’m not… 

Overwhelmed by everything, El stumbled off her bike and her knees buckled, sending her falling to the pavement. It hurt, and she was drained. Not physically drained, like when she’s flipped a van or killed an entire group of people, but emotionally drained. She was sad and anxious and afraid more than anything, and there were no good words to describe the million thoughts swimming in her brain, screaming at her.

Hurry, hurry. Fix this. You’re good at fixing things. Fix it before you lose her.

She closed her eyes, ready to disappear.

It almost worked. She felt herself being lifted up, and when she opened her eyes, she was in the backseat of the car.

“My bike…” was all she could say.

“I’m sure Jonathan can take it back to your house.” Nancy’s voice soothed El, not ending the screaming in her skull but lowering the volume. “Right, Jonathan?”

El’s older brother nodded, and she forced a half smile. Jonathan got out of the car and Nancy took his place in the passenger seat.

“So, where are we going?” Steve’s charisma had a different effect than Nancy’s comfort, but it helped all the same.

Max’s house.

The more the thought, the less ready she was for that conversation. Because if she stood in the same room as that girl for a millisecond, everything would come pouring out of El.

She just needed a place to lie down.

“Home,” she muttered. And the car was moving, rumbling on the road.

\-----

Alone.

It was her fault. She was the one who told the three teens to go away.

The thought of alone time was great. The reality, though…

It was solitary confinement. It was the too-small room that El found herself locked in for hours, with no one on the other side of the door to hear her screams. Except now, the screaming was inside of her own head.

The minutes ticked by as El shifted her position on the couch, turning the TV on and off. On and off.

You should have just chased after her.

On.

The television shows a smiling couple, a man and a woman.

Off.

Hungry.

El didn’t know if she was actually hungry, or just at risk of chewing her own teeth off. Either way, she stood and went to the fridge in search of Eggos.

Knock knock knock.

Will was home already?

El opened the door to find--

Max. Standing there, tugging at a hair tie on her wrist. Not like she was when she biked over after a nightmare. But broken all the same.

“Max--”

“I shouldn’t have run. I… I should have talked to you, or explained, and… I’m sorry.”

She was sorry? Why was Max sorry when El was the one at fault.

El didn’t know how to respond. So, they stood there. And El really wished it was late at night, after a nightmare, so she’d have an excuse to collapse into her best friend’s arms and cuddle on the couch and drink hot chocolate… 

But it was midday, and too warm for hot chocolate, and the only nightmare was inside of El’s head.

“Want to… come in?” Please say yes, please--

Max nodded.

El stepped aside to let her in.

And the two girls found themselves in the kitchen.

“Want some water?” El didn’t really know what she was saying, but she was going to put this off as long as she could. Even though Max was already there.

Stalling.

She remembered that word specifically, because Max taught it to her. Back when their biggest problem was El’s relationship with Mike.

“We’re going to the mall,” Max had said.

“But shouldn’t I talk to Mike?”

“Pfft. No. We’re going to stall for as long as we can.”

“What is stall?”

And Max had explained it. And then she grabbed El’s hand and gave her a look that made her melt…

And that was the first time El felt more than friendship for Max, she was just realizing.

“El?” El realized that she was standing in the kitchen, facing the fridge and staring at it. She turned to face Max, who looked concerned. “Are you alright?

No. El nodded. “Yes.”

Max looked relieved but still caring. How dare you, you’re supposed to hate me-- “Um, I don’t want any water. But thanks.”

“Max.” No more putting this off.

Max looked up. Nervous. El was nervous, too.

“I… I asked you that question… Because, I was wondering if you felt… the same.”

“Huh?” Curiosity shone in Max’s eyes, the eyes that were adorably blue, that fit her face so well, that made El want to stare into them and get lost forever… 

El was still learning things. She was learning a lot about herself. Just recently she found out that she was bisexual. She found out that she didn’t want to kiss Mike anymore. She found out what love is, at least, according to her brother’s description. She learned so much, and she experienced so much, and she’d lived so much with Max. Max, who didn’t know her own worth. Who didn’t know that her smile was a ray of sunshine that made El’s day better. Who didn’t know that her eyes were El’s eternity.

But El wasn’t good with words. So, she spoke three that she knew, staring right into those shining eyes.

“I love you.”


	17. this is my smile on her lips

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> max hears that el loves her and says it back

“You… what?” Max asks and immediately pinches herself, praying she’s not dreaming. It stings, so she blinks and assumes that this is all a prank. 

“I love you,” El whispers and looks up at her like Max has always dreamed about. 

“Why?” is all she can reply. 

“Because you’re funny and smart and kind and brave and…” El brushes a hair out of Max’s face, “Pretty.” 

Max wants to tell her everything- tell her she started falling the moment El showed up at the door to the Byers house, hair slicked back and fists clenched. She wants to tell her she’s been in freefall ever since, that every time her best friend (maybe more?) smiles, she feels like she’s on a rollercoaster and it’s dropping straight down. But, the only thing she can say is… 

“Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes,” Max starts at a whisper but soon, she’s shouting and shaking because she’s so overwhelmed with happiness. 

“Yes?” 

“Yes!” she’s laughing now and raising her fists in victory, saying look, assholes. You tried to silence me, tried to push me down and here we are now. 

“So, do you…” El is stepping forward now and Max grins like crazy. 

“Yes, I love you. I love you more than I’ve ever loved anything and I don’t want to stop.” 

El throws her own words back at her when she asks, “Why?” 

“Because… because you make me feel safe and alive all at once. Because the only way I can sleep is when you’re next to me. Because I want to spend every minute with you for the rest of my life. Because you make me a better person. Because you are the most radiant human being I’ve ever met and… and I just… I love you, El. You’ll never even know how much.” 

“What is radiant?” El asks, sounding out each syllable. 

“You,” Max replies, reaches out and grabs El’s hand. 

“I love you,” the girl she loves says again and Max’s heart shatters, but in a good way. She feels El’s breath on her face, can see her reflection in the girl’s eyes and closes her own before leaning in. 

“Is this ok?” she asks and when El says yes, it’s like she’s falling in love all over again, again and again and again. Max wants to do it a thousand times over until the only thing she knows is this girl’s eyes and her smile and her voice and her everything. 

Then, they’re kissing and not even the dark corners of Max’s mind are thinking about her brother-not-brother or the screams (El’s mixed with her own) or anything else. Everything is consumed by this beautiful, radiant human being in front of her until all she sees is those eyes, that smile, that voice. Until she’s finally, finally, finally safe again. 

They pull apart and Max rests her forehead against El’s when they trade secret smiles. 

This is mine, she wants to scream. This is my smile on her lips. This is mine, mine, mine.

And her heart, her mind and her everything feel so damn alive that she wants to scream at the wonder of it all. 

Look at me, the girl from California who wasn’t good at anything but zooming away. Look at how far I’ve come. Look at me, the girl who doesn’t feel safe in her own home. Look at how strong I am now. Look at me, the girl who was afraid to realize she was in love. Look at me, look at me, look at me. 

For the first time in forever, she truly feels like Mad Max. Crazy with love and life and El. 

“I love you,” someone whispers. She’s not sure if it’s her voice or the other girl’s but then, they’re kissing again, like they never stopped. 

“Shit!” Mike shouts and drops his plate on the floor of the kitchen. Max watches as it cracks. 

“You’re kinda interrupting something, Wheeler,” she replies. 

“I can tell!” 

His face is bright red and as he turns to leave, he runs straight into Will, knocking both of them over. El lets out a laugh that makes Max want to kiss her again, but instead, she just presses her lips to the top of the girl’s forehead and feels El’s smile. 

“You ok?” Will asks as they stand up. 

“Yep,” Mike squeaks out and he’s bright red again, but for completely different reasons. 

El’s sort-of-brother looks back and forth from El to Max and grins, “So… that finally happened.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Max challenges. 

“Ask El,” he shrugs, grabs Mike’s hand and drags him out of the room. 

“El?”

“He just means that I like you. A lot,” El mutters, suddenly embarrassed. 

“Well, that’s good. Because I like you too,” Max smiles, wider than she thought was possible and has to swallow her laughter. 

She loves me. She loves ME. She chose me. 

“I love you,” she says it again and again until her voice is hoarse and El is grinning just as wildly. 

When they clutch each other like life lines and give away all of their truths, everything is right with the world.


	18. her embrace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> El has another nightmare and Max cuddles with her afterwards

For the first time, El’s nightmares weren’t just full of the usual monsters. She was sitting in Starcourt Mall, frozen, screaming in pain as Papa cut her leg open. She squirmed and pushed and-- Then she was in Hawkins Lab, sitting in a chair. On the other side was Max, sneering at her and yelling, calling her awful names and it grew louder, and louder, and--

El sat up in bed in a cold sweat, shaking, screaming. Remembering every vivid detail of the dream before it phased away and El was just sitting alone in the darkness.

_ Max. She doesn’t hate me. She would never hurt me. Max. _

_ I need her. _

El stood up and maneuvered through the dark to find the kitchen lightswitch.  _ Flick. _ The bright yellow glow burned El’s eyes for a second. Squinting, opened the cupboard to grab a glass.  _ Water. _ She opened the freezer, freeing two ice cubes to put in the cup before filling it with water from the sink.

After a few sips, she was better.

A soft knock at the door. El set down the water and went to open it quickly, hoping to see Max. She pulled it open and…

There was the redhead, looking on the verge of tears. Something inside El shattered to see Max looking so broken.

But Max and El gazed into each other's eyes and for El, everything felt okay.

They did the familiar dance of falling into each other's arms and landing on the couch. Only this time, El noticed things more. She noticed how Max’s hands held tightly to her waist. She noticed the way they rested their heads on each other's shoulders. She noticed how alive and free and safe she felt in the embrace of the girl who was home.

“I love you,” El whispered. A new addition to their late-night tango, but it fit perfectly with the routine.

“I love you.” El smiled widely and moved her head so that she could see the girl next to her.

Max’s face was flushed and she was smiling, too. Their eyes met. Everytime El saw Max it felt like she was meeting her all over again. She loved it. She loved all of it.

They ended up curled up together, blanket left forgotten. They had each other's warmth.

After a few minutes of silence, Max asked, “Wanna talk about it?”

Yes. She wanted nothing more. But if Max knew the deep insecurities in her mind, and the nightmares and the fear… What would she think?

“I don’t want to lose you,” she said before she could stop herself.

Max found her hand and squeezed it. Looking into El’s eyes she said, “El, I promise that you won’t lose me. And I won’t lose you.”

El wanted to cry of happiness. But she didn’t have any tears. So she held Max tight.

Comfort. Home. Warmth. Max kissed her forehead. Home.

Max in the nightmare wasn’t real. She was just an embodiment of El’s fear. Maybe the Max who sat holding her could drive away that fear.

But it still sat there in her mind.  _ Festering, _ she remembered, shuddering at the memory of her sister’s recreation of Papa.

“Hey, I’m here,” Max murmured. El felt herself calm down. Everything about Max was so comforting and supporting and safe. How could she even be real?

“Okay,” El muttered back, sinking into a state of drowsiness.

“So, you know how we went with Will and Mike for ice cream?” Max asked. El hummed an affirmative. “Maybe we could do that again? Or something. Now that we… well, now that things are different.”

_ That sounds nice. _ El mumbled a yes. And before drifting off, she thought she heard Max say something else.

“Nightmares are only for night. With you everything is a daydream.”


	19. this is what family feels like

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> after a bad night, max bolts towards the byers house yet again and el decides to do something about it.

“I can’t live there anymore,” Max says after she comes running to the Byers house in the middle of the night yet again. 

“What’s wrong?” Will asks and she just looks at him before bursting into tears. 

He’s across the kitchen in a few footsteps, throwing his arms around her as she cries into his chest, but when he touches the small of her back, she’s reminded of the screaming and the way Neil shoved her against the wall, with his face so close to hers that the hatred was magnified and she saw her life flash before her eyes. 

“Did he hurt you?” he asks after a minute and she nods. 

Joyce, who’s been standing in the doorway, puts a steady hand on Max’s arm and asks, “Where?” 

Max lifts up the back of her shirt so they can see the bruise, even though it’s not the only one. 

A few minutes later, she’s on the couch with an ice pack pressed to her back when El wanders into the room. She smiles at first and then sees Max’s back and a shadow of anger passes over her face. 

“Who did this?” she growls. 

“I…” Max is speechless before she whispers, “My… Neil.” 

El clenches her fists and grits her teeth while Will says something quiet in her ear. Her face softens a little bit and she comes to sit on the couch next to Max, kissing her on both cheeks and the forehead. 

“I love you,” she says and Max smiles through the pain. 

“I love you more,” she replies and El just laughs a little bit. 

They fall asleep tangled up in each other and Max doesn’t dream of anything besides the girl right next to her. It’s the first time in a long time that darkness hasn’t crept into her dreams and she’s thankful for it. 

In the morning, when Max opens an eye, the entire party is sitting in the kitchen. El’s perched on one of the counters, Lucas is pacing back and forth from the kitchen to the living room, Dustin’s sitting on the couch next to Max and Mike and Will are seated at the kitchen table with their legs intertwined, as always. 

“What are you guys doing here?” she asks and her voice comes out hoarse. 

“El called us,” Dustin replies. 

“Oh,” she mutters and curls up, trying to get back into the dream she was having when she took El to California and they ran on the beaches until they could grab the horizon. 

“You can live with me,” Lucas says and she opens an eye, shocked. 

“I…  _ what? _ ” 

“You can’t stay there, Max. He’s hurting you,” he reasons. 

“I have to,” her voice cracks and the tears she didn’t know were right there are falling. 

Suddenly, the whole party’s crowded onto the couch- El has her hands in Max’s hair and she’s holding her like there’s no tomorrow, Dustin is squeezing her left hand, Lucas is stroking her back (somehow avoiding the bruise), Will is kneeling in front of her and grasping her right arm and Mike is next to him, reaching out to put a hand on her shoulder. 

Max feels like she’s  _ home _ . But, there’s this underlying fear that tastes metallic in the back of her mouth as her stepfather’s face haunts her. 

Even though he’s not here, his breath is on her cheek and his voice is in her ear. 

“Max?” El asks as she tenses up. 

“I have to get out.” 

That’s that. They start drawing up plans like it’s a D&D campaign and soon, Will’s living room floor is littered with diagrams and complicated strategies and escape routes and potential new homes. 

_ Home.  _

The word is nice to think about, but the feeling is better. Max hasn’t ever felt that way before, like she’s being hugged when no one’s touching her, like someone wants her, like she  _ belongs.  _

Sometime during the day, Jonathan, Robin, Nancy and Steve wander in together. Nancy and Robin are holding hands and Jonathan and Steve keeps sending lovesick glances at each other when they think no one’s looking. 

“What’s this?” Will’s brother asks and frowns as he picks up Mike’s hastily scribbled plans to smuggle Max food at Castle Byers. 

“We’re kidnapping Max so she doesn’t have to live with her douchebag step-dad anymore!” Dustin replies cheerfully and Max glares at him. It wasn’t his story to tell- it was hers and she wasn’t going to say it. Not yet at least. 

“You can live with me, if you want.” 

Robin’s voice is  _ not  _ what Max was expecting, especially not with that offer. 

“Are you sure?” is the only thing she can say, convincing herself it’s too good to be true. Robin wouldn’t want her there anyway. She’s not… she doesn’t deserve… 

Robin nods, “My parents are really chill and I’ve always wanted a sister.” 

“ _ Sister?!”  _ Max repeats her words and frowns a little bit. She just doesn’t understand…. 

“Of course,” she nods and Max wants to jump for joy or scream or hug her or all of the above. 

Meanwhile, Steve is staring at the rest of the papers and his brow furrows while he reads them before he shouts, “I’m going to kill this son of a bitch!”, then storms out. 

“Wait for me!” Lucas shouts and hops up to sprint after him. Robin, El, Nancy and Mike follow them, fists clenched and even though it’s weird to feel this way now, Max is just so happy that they  _ care.  _ That they’re willing to stand up for her, to fight for her 

Of course she’d do the same thing for any of the people in this room, even Nancy who she barely knows. They’re her home, her family and she wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Then, Max hears the car engine revving and she realizes that Steve was being completely serious. So, she, Will and Dustin make eye contact and sprint out to the driveway to see everyone else squished in the car and El firing off directions to Steve as he starts backing out. 

“Guys!” she shouts over the car’s wheels squeaking on gravel, “What the hell are you doing?!” 

“Beating up your step-dad!” Mike screams back through the open window of the back seat. 

“Nance can fire a gun like nobody’s business!” Jonathan adds and Robin stares at Mike’s older sister like she hasn’t seen her before. 

“Will?” she elbows him out of gaping at Mike and he turns back to her. 

“Oh, yeah, no murder!” 

“Will!” she hisses. 

“Guys, seriously. Out of the car,” Joyce stands on the porch steps and crosses her arms. 

“Ms. Byers!” Steve whines. 

“I’m coming too, so you need to make some room,” she says, “Besides, this probably isn’t appropriate for children.” 

Mike, El and Lucas groan, then get out of the car as Joyce slips in and cracks her knuckles, getting ready for a smackdown. El comes to stand by Max and wraps her arms around Max’s waist before leaning her chin on her shoulder and kissing her ear. 

“You two are disgusting,” Dustin rolls his eyes and Max flips him off yet again. 

As Steve pulls out of the driveway and Max watches them go, she wonders what’s going to happen- whether Neil will actually get beat up or get a stern Joyce Byers talking to (which is worse) or maybe even arrested… for the first time she allows herself to  _ hope  _ and she feels free. 

“I love you,” she says to El because she can and because it’s truer than anything else. 

“I love you,” the other girl replies and Lucas fake gags. Max would’ve tackled him and punched him in the face right then and there but she knows it’s not about her and El both being girls. It’s about them being in love and him teasing. 

They’ve already had  _ that  _ conversation, about how she’s sorry she kept stringing him along because she’d never like him like that, even though he means a lot to her. 

He just hugged her, shrugged and said it wasn’t meant to be. 

The party goes back inside and blasts Will’s music while jumping all over the house. Lucas tries to teach Dustin how to moonwalk, but they both end up in a heap on the floor. Max and El grab hands and shimmy, screaming along even though neither of them know the words, Will gets on a table and drags Mike up there too, even though he’s not doing much dancing, just staring at the shorter boy. 

Once they’re all panting and laughing so hard it hurts, they collapse on top of the couch together. 

A few hours later, they hear Steve’s car pulling back into the driveway and run outside. 

Jonathan gets out first, a fist held over his head and he’s grinning victoriously as he shouts, “We beat his ass!” 

“Serves him right,” Will yells back and Max can tell they aren’t exactly talking about Neil anymore. 

So, she puts a hand on her friend’s shoulder and whispers to him that she’s there if he ever needs anything, including murdering his dad. He laughs a bit and replies he might take her up on it if the shithead ever tries to get rich off his life insurance again.

Next to him, Mike bristles and grits his teeth, so Max knows she won’t be the only one ready to slap Lonnie Byers multiple times. 

“Mouth breather,” El mutters, clenching her fists so hard that Max is scared she will draw blood. 

She’s reminded of the nights sitting at the Byers kitchen table and drinking hot chocolate, listening as El whispered to her stories of the lab and the bath in the experiments in a shaky voice that had Max sobbing too by the end of it. 

Max isn’t the only one who’s been hurt by people who were supposed to protect her. They’ve all been betrayed or broken or torn down in one way or another and yet, they rose out of the ashes and found a new, better family- DNA be damned. These thirteen souls (including Hopper) are connected now, in ways that don’t rely on blood. 

At the end of the day, Max is glad for these people and their loud, stupid jokes and their hugs that make her feel  _ loved  _ for once. She couldn’t ask for a better family. 

Nancy steps out of the car next, gripping Robin’s arm tightly and her mouth is drawn in a thin, straight line when she stares at Max and says, “If that man ever lays a hand on you again, I will shoot him.” 

Max doesn’t even know Nancy, didn’t even get along with her brother until a couple weeks ago, but tears of joy and gratitude start running down her face all the same. 

Lately, it seems like she’s always crying, but these people put her back together again. 

She doesn’t know what happens, but everyone surges towards her and then, she’s surrounded by people and arms, thrown into a messy group hug with her face in Steve’s chest, Nancy’s shoulder poking her in the back, El’s hands in her hair, Mike’s fingers brushing hers, Will’s arm around her waist, Robin’s forehead on the back of her head, her cheek brushing Jonathan’s jacket, Dustin’s hair in her mouth, Lucas’s hand gripping one of her’s… she’s never felt more free or alive. 

“I love you guys,” she whispers into the hug and when everyone responds by murmuring  _ love you too,  _ Max’s heart explodes into a thousand pieces of confetti and glitter. Laughter bubbles up in her chest and soon, she’s letting it out. 

Steve starts chuckling too- she feels the vibrations in his chest- and then, Will’s laughing and Robin is giggling and Jonathan’s cackling and everything feels ok. 

“Why are we laughing?” Dustin asks, but that makes her laugh even harder. 

They break apart after a few minutes and walk inside to where Joyce gives her a kiss on the forehead and a steaming mug of hot chocolate, even though it’s an afternoon in August ane everyone crowds into the Byers living room sharing stories of stupid pranks, the strangest things they believed as children and what they think the meaning of life is. 

It’s a strange mix of wonderful, bittersweet and absolutely brilliant. 

Max thinks she might burst because she’s filled to the brim with so much joy and love. She’s never been this happy before, except when she’s with El. 

The girl she loves leans her head on Max’s shoulder and plays with strands of her hair, occasionally whispering stupid jokes in her ear that make her laugh aloud. Everyone else stares and she thinks,  _ let them.  _

_ Let them see how lucky I am, to have this girl that loves me back. To have this human being I’ve been dreaming about, to realize that dreams really do come true sometimes. Let them see that I’ve never been so in love with her or with life itself. Let them see how alive we are. Let them stare, because I am on fire.  _

_ Let them see that I know this isn’t how the story goes, but it’s so much better.  _

Max looks around to see everyone else lost in their own worlds. Steve and Jonathan keep gazing at each other and then looking away when the other one makes eye contact, Nancy and Robin are staring at each other like they’re the only people in the room, Dustin and Lucas are angrily whispering about something or another and Will and Mike… 

Will and Mike are sitting next to each other on the floor. Will’s head is on Mike’s shoulder and Mike’s bright red again, but they’ve both got the sweetest smiles on their faces, like the way Max feels when she looks at El. 

She wants to shake both of them by the shoulders until they stop being so oblivious. 

Instead, she just points it out to El, who grins a little bit and replies, “I knew it!” 

The two girls hi-five and then Max kisses El on the cheek, because she loves her and because she can. Joyce smiles at the two of them and looks so  _ proud  _ that Max realizes she’s finally got a mom that’s not a nineteen year old boy with a bat that has nails sticking out of it and a way too obvious crush on his ex-girlfriend’s ex-boyfriend, who also happens to be his favorite child’s older brother. 

Max knows it’s complicated, but she wouldn’t have her strange little family any other way. 

“Who wants to watch a movie?” Steve shotus after everyone’s been silent for a little bit too long. 

“Me!” they all chorus and then, Max is in the Byers car between El and Mike while Will sits up front and Joyce drives. Robin, Steve, Nancy, Jonathan, Dustin and Lucas are in the other car and they’re racing through the streets of Hawkins, laughing like nothing else matters. 

Once they end up at the Wheeler house, Nancy opens the door and they all pound down the stairs to the basement. Well, except for Joyce who’s an adult that goes to find Karen. 

Half an hour into A New Hope, Lucas and Dustin are arguing about the light vs dark side of the force, Max is curled up in El’s lap while the girl she loves plays with her hair, Steve and Jonathan are sitting suspiciously close together, Robin and Nancy are already sleep on each other and of course, Will and Mike are practically cuddling. 

“Good night,” Max mumbles and then falls asleep, listening to El’s heartbeat and finally, for the first time, looking forward to tomorrow. 


	20. forever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> El, Max, Mike, and Will get ice cream and bike around town.

Four bikes parked outside of an ice cream shop. Four teens holding cones. Four smiles.

“Wanna switch?” Max asked and El grinned and nodded, handing Max her vanilla ice cream and taking Max’s strawberry.

“Mm,” she said. It tasted like happiness. Light. Victory.

As they started walking to anywhere, El glanced over at Will and Mike, who were so close that their hands were practically touching. Both boys were bright red and silent.

El glanced over at Max and both of them burst into laughter.

“What’s so funny?” Mike asked, trying to be intimidating but coming across as a puppy.

“Nothing,” El managed through her laughter.

Soon Will was laughing along with them, which of course made Mike turn into even more of a mess. Which made Max laugh even harder, which made El completely lose it and almost drop her ice cream cone.

The laughter died down and turned into a comfortable quiet. El listened to the noises of the street. A car horn in the distance. Laughter. A sprinkler. Bells jingling as store doors opened and closed.

This was El’s home, but it would never match the three people standing next to her. They were home. Max was home.

El barely thought when she offered her hand to Max. She grabbed it immediately, because who cares what people think? They’re all a bunch of mouth breathers, anyway.

Max squeezed El’s hand. She squeezed back.

“I love you,” El whispered. Max smiled the words back, and El knew what she meant-- but Max wasn’t quite ready to say that in public yet.

They came to an intersection and Mike asked, “Where now?” El looked over at him to see him staring at Will. (Very subtle.) She gave him a look and he somehow turned even redder.

Max’s voice brought El back to reality. “Everywhere, Wheeler.” She took a bite of her cone and El smiled, somehow falling more in love each second

“We’ll ride into the sunset. Of course, we’ll need our bikes first,” Will was saying, completely oblivious to the mess that was Mike.

They all agreed and walked back to where their bikes were parked, finishing their ice cream. El savored every bit of it. Ever since she’d discovered  _ ice cream _ , Eggos had had a run for their money.

They set off on their bikes. Somehow Mike ended up in the front, and they all followed. They didn’t have a destination, only each other and the sun shining above them. They rode around town, passing the Hawkins’ pool and several stores, riding through neighborhoods, and passing trees and fields. Eventually they decided to ride by everyone’s house.

They started at Mike’s, then biked all the way to the road by the Byers’ house. El and the others started to bike away before noticing that Will was quiet. Soon Mike was at his side, and El and Max were parking their bikes.

“What’s wrong?” Mike asked.

Will shook his head. “Mike… you biked all this way…” Mike’s face softened in recognition.

El had no clue what they were talking about.

Max grabbed El’s hand and dragged her away so that the two of them could have their moment. El started to say something but noticed that Max was looking off, too.

“Max? Are you okay?”

She shrugged. “Yeah, it’s just… How are we going to bike by my house? I’m not sure where I… Where I belong.” Her eyes cast down.

El pulled Max into a hug, not wanting to ever let go.

“I love you,” she whispered. “And Max… Your home is whatever you want it to be. Whatever place or people.”

“You are my home,” came Max’s quick reply, as she hugged El tighter.

El smiled. It felt so right and real. It felt like it had been this way forever, and it would never stop.

“You’re mine too.”  _ I love you _ .

They pulled apart and El intertwined their hands. Both girls were smiling brightly as they turned back to Will and Mike, who were talking quietly. It seemed like it was a serious conversation.

“Should we wait for them?” El asked.

Max grinned mischievously. “Mmm… No.” And the two girls were hopping on their bikes, laughing while biking away, as Mike and Will followed after them, confused.

“You guys can keep talking! Or kissing, or whatever! I’m taking your sister, Will!” Max yelled back at them. El smiled so wide that it hurt.

And they rode off together. Into the horizon. Into forever.

**Author's Note:**

> as always, comments and kudos are much appreciated!! please come talk to us on tumblr at @eraseyourbookofstories and @strangerthingsiscool!! at least for @eraseyourbookofstories, messages aren't working, so please send asks instead if you want to get in touch. love you beautiful people <3


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